We Held A Viking Funeral For Internet Explorer

 
 
 
 
 

By FOD News

Published March 24, 2015 More Info »

This is what we imagined our viking funeral for Internet Explorer would look like. See below for what is actually ended up looking like. Spoiler alert: even more awesome. 

As you may know, Microsoft Internet Explorer, the web browser that dominated the early days of the internet, is to be discontinued. For many of us, this was a formative web browser, one that was our first portal to that thing called the internet that would bring us porn, allow us to chat with our crushes, and would, one day, employ us to make masturbation jokes for its pleasure.

Because we all felt this loss deeply, and because we were all lightly bored on a Thursday afternoon (and is there any feeling more evocative of Internet Explorer than a bunch of lightly bored office workers?), we knew we had to celebrate IE’s passage out of this world.

We decided to make IE a tiny boat and set it on fire.

Here is the tiny boat that we made.

Here is what we put in the tiny boat.
1. CD-ROM of Internet Explorer.
Not a real CD-ROM of IE, that would be crazy. Why would we have that? No, we just took an empty CD case and pasted an IE label on it.

2.Erotica Erotica Erotica Erotica Erotica On-Line JPEG.
This is an actual porn advertisement JPEG from the ’90s internet. Doesn’t this lady arching boobs-first out of a mid-’90s PC take you back? Remember how Internet Explorer’s security was so bad that if you’d had your computer for more than a year, it was at least 70% porny viruses by weight? Memories.

3. Tabbed folder.
For the tabs Explorer did not have for way too long.

4. Crying Livejournal goat.
We don’t think Livejournal and IE were officially affiliated, but they both scream 2003. 

5. Effigy of Bill Gates.
Because the captain always goes down with the ship.